18th June, 2024
There’s no doubt that the fostering assessment process can be a daunting task for potential foster carers. With the initial visit, probably the most nerve wracking of all. The initial visit, for those who don’t know, is where a Fostering Recruitment Advisor (FRA) comes out to your home to learn all about you and make sure the house is suitable for a young person.
So, why would this be scary? You may be thinking. For many, the idea of their home being judged is never a pleasant one, and the in-depth questions that are asked can sometimes feel intrusive. We caught up with our very own FRA in the North, Jamie, to tell us all about that first visit.
“When we’re looking at a potential foster carers home, it’s not about judging their décor or the way they live – it’s all about ensuring the safety of the child. Making sure they have a room of their own, and an environment they feel secure in.
“Practically I’m looking for a home that feels welcoming. A child will feel so nervous that first time, so I have my eye out for an uncluttered and tidy space. Also, a communal space where they can sit and play with the foster child.
“It goes without saying that a spare bedroom is vital. One which can fit a single bed, a wardrobe and draws. I’ve heard before of families offering to move their own children to sharing a bedroom to accommodate a foster child, or the parents sleeping in the living room. It’s nice that they’re desperate to help a child but I’d advise against this, it could cause feelings of resentment towards the foster child and just isn’t practical long term.
“Other than that, it’s about safety – is the garden secure? Are there any visible risks? Is the house reasonably clean? It doesn’t need to be immaculate!”
“People worry so much about the questions we have to ask to potential foster carers. Yes, they delve deep into your past. But that’s because what you’ll be doing is so so important. Possibly one of the most important things you’ll ever do.
If someone else was looking after your child, what would you want to know?
“It’s not about hiding part of yourself, I’m looking for someone with real, lived experiences. Someone who’s caring, kind, enthusiastic and being willing to learn is vital. If you have experience with children, that’s great but more than anything I value openness and honesty. To be a great foster carer you need to be resilient. Let that warm and fun side of yourself shine through.
“On a practical level, you need to be healthy, mentally and physically. Being a smoker doesn’t mean you can’t foster, but I need to know as only children over aged five will be able to be matched to you.”
“Don’t assume you can’t foster – talk to us! We understand that people have things in their past they think will hold them back – in fact, going through hardship can often be what’s lead people to want to help others. Often, it’s not a flat out no, we can talk through things like convictions, debts, issues in past relationships and some illnesses. I never judge your past which has meant you want to help children; I’ll try my hardest to get you there.
“If you’re still mulling over if it’s for you. Drop by to an event and chat to us face to face. That way you get a feel for who we are too. Don’t forget, this is an important decision for you too.”
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Start the conversation today. Our team of friendly advisors are on hand to answer any foster care questions you may have. We can offer you honest and practical advice that can help you decide if becoming a foster carer is the right path for you.
